Funny Book Forensics 362 Fake Lobo and Crappy Doctor Strange

Episode 362 June 19, 2024 01:21:10
Funny Book Forensics 362 Fake Lobo and Crappy Doctor Strange
Funny Book Forensics
Funny Book Forensics 362 Fake Lobo and Crappy Doctor Strange

Jun 19 2024 | 01:21:10

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Show Notes

Greg and Dan review Captain America 403. Dan is waiting for Cap Wolf to show up. All we get is fake lobo and crappy Doctor Strange. 

Creative Team:

Main
Writers: Mark Gruenwald; Penciller: Rik Levins; Inker: Danny Bulanadi; Colors: Gina Going; Letterer: Joe Rosen; Editors: Ralph Macchio

Back-Up

Writers: Mark Gruenwald; Penciller: Larry Alexander; Inker: Ariane Lenshoek; Colors: Ariane Lenshoek; Letterer: Steve Dutro; Editors: Ralph Macchio

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Episode Transcript

[00:00:01] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. [00:00:02] Speaker B: Well, friends, if you like the dulcet tones I had when I had the podcast with Travis, we're back at that voice level after I taught a class for two days. Again, I've decided maybe this isn't the best time to record a podcast immediately after talking for, like, 18 hours over two previous days. But you're getting that voice, and it's a very excited voice, because here we are on man and wolf. Cap wolf, part two of six. [00:00:28] Speaker A: It's such a funny title. Man and wolf. [00:00:33] Speaker B: Well, you know, there's a man and a wolf and a fake lobo and a Wolverine and Castle Wolfenstein inside you. [00:00:47] Speaker A: There's. There's two men and two wolves. [00:00:50] Speaker B: Which one will you be now as Castle Wolfenstein? That was just german Nazis, right? [00:00:57] Speaker A: You were fighting against them. Yes. You were like. [00:01:01] Speaker B: Yeah, so Castle Wolfenstein would be like. It'd be like red Skull wolf. [00:01:08] Speaker A: Yeah. So if, like, Cap was like, wolf skull. [00:01:11] Speaker B: Cap was back in wolf skull back. [00:01:13] Speaker A: In Germany, and he was in a covert mission, and he was running through a castle full of nazi werewolves. And he was. And he was fighting them. [00:01:24] Speaker B: He would fight wolf skull. [00:01:25] Speaker A: He would fight. The end would fight. Now that's a video game I would play. That's actually pretty cool. He'd be throwing a shield. He's like, bow. Just throwing it around and stuff like that. And then all of a sudden be. [00:01:38] Speaker B: Growling at, you know, well, I mean. [00:01:39] Speaker A: He'S not a wolf. I mean, unless he was a wolf. Would he be. Well, cuz you. Would he be. Would he be a werewolf fighting Nazis or would he be fighting werewolf Nazis? [00:01:51] Speaker B: I don't know, but we were promised cap Wolf, and I'm two issues in, and I've seen none of this cap wolf thing. [00:01:58] Speaker A: Maybe we haven't got there yet. I mean, don't. [00:02:01] Speaker B: Well, it's too far. It's already. [00:02:05] Speaker A: Your expectations are, I need a captain werewolf or a werewolf cap or a cap wolf. [00:02:14] Speaker B: Yes, that's what I was expecting. [00:02:16] Speaker A: I need. [00:02:16] Speaker B: We were supposed to be covering the cap wolf stories, and this so far is shitty fake lobo wolverine lurking in the background being completely incompetent. No, that's fake Timberwolf. [00:02:32] Speaker A: Who is. Yeah, kind of fake lobo. [00:02:37] Speaker B: Well, it's like Dave Cockrum's Timberwolf, but not. Well, anyway, but it's clearly John Burns. [00:02:46] Speaker A: But. [00:02:46] Speaker B: But really was created by Len Wein. So with none of those creators. But I think. I think it's a big. I think the argument is that Dave Cockrum probably did the art and then John Byrne gets all the credit because, you know, life, I don't know. Anyway, and here we go. All right, so we're gonna start mowing the lawn right outside with all the podcasts. [00:03:14] Speaker A: You're gonna have the lawn being mowed? I'm having. [00:03:18] Speaker B: Yeah. In fact, they started to just start with my lawn today instead of the neighbor's lawn, which is always nice, 2 hours late. It's inevitable if Greg and I try to record a podcast on a Friday day of the week, which this is, but not the Friday that you're hearing this, because you'll be hearing this on a Wednesday. But inevitably the lawn people will show up, even though they've been coming on Thursdays for the last few months. But if I do something on Friday, then that's when they show up. Because they know. [00:03:46] Speaker A: They know. [00:03:48] Speaker B: Honestly, if you listen to Jim Cornette's podcast with Brian last, this happens on their podcast, too, all the time. Like Brian last long, guys will show up. So what I think that means is we have now, I mean, they have like millions of listeners. I think that just means we are now in that state where we are so respected that the lawn people know and want to be on the podcast and millions of listeners can hear them one with them. [00:04:22] Speaker A: Yes. [00:04:23] Speaker B: Yes, we have ascended. [00:04:25] Speaker A: Yes, we have ascended. We have ascended power. [00:04:28] Speaker B: We have ascended powerful podcasting gods on. [00:04:32] Speaker A: Their shoulders that we are. [00:04:34] Speaker B: That's right. [00:04:35] Speaker A: We are not the gods. We are the shoulders of them. Of those we are. But, but specs. And we are excited to be there because to be specs upon those shoulders only means that, that soon we will become part of them. I don't know. I don't know how it all works. Yeah, we're ascending. [00:04:58] Speaker B: In t minus like 20 seconds. The dogs are going to come. Let me know that there are people outside, too. Yeah, well, anyway, when we are looking at. I don't even know what I'm transitioning to here. You know, if you ever wanted to find our podcast, hypothetically, but find some other awesome podcasts too, that are kind of restarting up, like something about spandex and something. Speaking of wrestling, you could go to Project Dash nerd.com and find podcasts there. [00:05:37] Speaker A: All on their website and on their Facebook instagrams. [00:05:42] Speaker B: No, that's not true. Project asch nerd calm. You can find skateboards and the latest, of course, and podcasts and things like that. If you go to project nerd on Facebook, you will find the latest in how Jack Black can fight dinosaurs. [00:06:11] Speaker A: Oh, my gosh, Jack black dinosaur slayer. [00:06:15] Speaker B: Oh, no, that doesn't say dinosaurs. That says Dionysus. [00:06:19] Speaker A: Oh, he's. [00:06:20] Speaker B: Is that different? [00:06:21] Speaker A: Yes. He's not a dinosaur slayer. He's. He's. He's actually. He's actually just a greek God. He came back. [00:06:29] Speaker B: He fights Wonder Woman. [00:06:31] Speaker A: Well, I mean, does he fight Wonder Woman, or does he just come back to hang out and party? [00:06:37] Speaker B: I think I feel like Dionysus fights Wonder Woman at some point. [00:06:40] Speaker A: I think so. Listeners, let us know. Do you think Dionysus, the greek God of partying? Partying? Yeah. [00:06:48] Speaker B: Yes, I know. Like, Dionysus, the greek God of partying, at least, was. Was plotting against Wonder Woman at one point. [00:06:56] Speaker A: Wonder Woman doesn't. [00:06:57] Speaker B: I remember reading it anymore. [00:06:59] Speaker A: It's just like, I don't like to party. I just. I don't wanna. [00:07:04] Speaker B: Either that or Dionysus was Wonder Woman's friend. I'm having a hard time remembering. It's hard to keep track of all these things. [00:07:10] Speaker A: Oh, man. [00:07:12] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:07:13] Speaker A: So, so much. So much to keep track of, but not enough to. [00:07:18] Speaker B: Now, I'm not wrong. Dionysus one screen rant says the 15 times Wonder Woman had to fight a Greek. Had to fight a God. Because, you know, it's a screen rant article. So if it's a CBR screen rant article, it's got to be. Everything has to be the top. 515, 510. Because they don't really have. They don't really have any inventive imagination at all. All they do is follow trends on the Internet. So, like, every article title has to be that. I remember her fighting strife. Yeah. Demos, Hercules, Grail. Apparently she fought Donna Troy, though. I don't know how Donna Troy was a greek God. I do remember reading that story. It obviously left a big impression on me, because I always thought that you should keep fucking with Donna Troy's character and changing it over and over and over again. Do you remember when Donna Troy was, like, married with a kid and then, like, off panel, the kid and the husband just were dead? [00:08:14] Speaker A: They became disappeared, quote unquote thing. [00:08:18] Speaker B: Yeah. Wonder Woman versus Darkseid. I don't think Darkseid is a great God. You know, I don't see anything. Maybe Dionysus was her buddy in one of the stories against, like, strife or something. I think that's it. It may be in the Azorello run. Hell, I don't know what I'm talking about. I just am saying words. [00:08:36] Speaker A: I thought Wonder Woman and Dionysus went to Ibiza for a long weekend, had a good time, you know? [00:08:45] Speaker B: No, I was right. It was this firstborn storyline. It's literally the first thing on here. Yeah. In the end, Wonder Woman had to kill Aries to stop the firstborn from killing them all. This is the moment made Diana the God of war and even more disgusted with the necessity of killing firstborn, then kidnapped Apollo. Kidnapped by Apollo and Dionysus, who cooked his flanks and then mocked him. So Dionysus cooked. Oh, so technically, Dionysus cooked an enemy of Wonder Woman. [00:09:13] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:09:16] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:17] Speaker A: Interesting. Was that in, was that in the Perez books? [00:09:21] Speaker B: No, that was later. I think that might have been. I don't want to attribute it to Gail when it's not, but it was either Simone or Azarillo, I think. Of course, this well written article on screen rant doesn't attribute any of these storylines to the creators that created that. [00:09:40] Speaker A: Here's the bigger question for you, because. [00:09:42] Speaker B: That would interfere with their word count in their top 15s if they actually, like, told you the creators. [00:09:48] Speaker A: Told you the creators of things. Well, here's my question, because I want to know, as you look at the screen right now, how many pop close. Ask how many pop up ads were on there. [00:09:59] Speaker B: Nine, because I have a pop up, and I'm also, I was gonna say. [00:10:03] Speaker A: I was like, I just want to know how many videos came up and how many pop ups and other things. [00:10:08] Speaker B: Like that, because I know I have, like, duckduckgo privacy installed and an ad blocker. So, yeah, that's what you need, people. [00:10:14] Speaker A: You need things like that to stop things like this. Hello. How's it going? You need to click this if you want to get that, or have you ever seen one of these before? No, you haven't. So why don't you click this? [00:10:25] Speaker B: If you'd like cooked human God flank steaks, please contact Dionysus Industries. We'll send them to your door hourly. [00:10:32] Speaker A: Hourly, in fact. [00:10:34] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. I saw, in fact, on project Dash nerd.com, i saw an advertisement just for that. [00:10:40] Speaker A: Wow. [00:10:40] Speaker B: Dionysus flank steaks. Yeah. [00:10:42] Speaker A: Jack Black will send them back. [00:10:44] Speaker B: Yeah, it's kind of like a, it's kind of like butcher box, except it comes hourly, hourly, and you have to eat it all. [00:10:51] Speaker A: It sounds like it hearkens back to the Jack Black movie with Ben Stiller where they make the poop disappear with a spray, and then they have that spray stuff that makes the dog poop go away, and then it's like the whole entire thing. It's like they were best friends, and they make the thing go away. And it's like thin. [00:11:11] Speaker B: You're sort of hurting my soul right now because there are so many amazing Jack black movies. And that's the one you picked? [00:11:23] Speaker A: Yes. [00:11:24] Speaker B: Thanks. You know, I mean, yeah, I mean, I had forgotten, I think that one I'd, you know, mostly because Ben Stiller is in it and he's, you know, probably. Wow. The most hideous, terrible, like, waste of screen time ever made. [00:11:41] Speaker A: Are you? No, no. [00:11:45] Speaker B: His dad is fantastic. [00:11:47] Speaker A: True, true. But you have to admit, the movie where he's like a detective in Portland. Fantastic. Great. [00:11:56] Speaker B: I mean, he's iconic for having cum in his hair. [00:12:05] Speaker A: Deep cut. Something about Mary. Wow. [00:12:08] Speaker B: It's not a deep cut. It's like a huge part of the fucking movie. [00:12:12] Speaker A: I say deep cut because like I forget. I totally forgot about that movie. [00:12:17] Speaker B: I blocked that whole thing. Things that turn me off from. Well, anyway. Okay. Yeah. Reasons I don't like Ben Stiller. Number 15. [00:12:29] Speaker A: Give me five more. Click the list. [00:12:32] Speaker B: You know what? One, he is the most average speaking, average looking actor in Hollywood. Number two, he has no humorous moments at all. Everything is written for him, right? Like he doesn't like, do jokes. Like, it has to be everything funny around him. Three, we're counting down. His sight gags are usually terrible. Right? Like he has to rely create completely on like basically physical comedy at that point because he's just inherently not funny. Two, in mystery men, Paul Rubens was the only thing good in the entire movie. Like somebody just walking around getting angry all the time. If I want to see that, I can just hang out with myself. Right? Like, I don't have to do that. [00:13:26] Speaker A: Yes. [00:13:27] Speaker B: And number one, I think, like anything Ben Stiller can do, I can do better. And if I can do something better than somebody that's like being paid millions of dollars, I just don't like. I think that's great. Like, I. His dad is amazing. [00:13:45] Speaker A: Wow, that was a rant. [00:13:48] Speaker B: I don't like him. [00:13:51] Speaker A: Oh, Dan. [00:13:52] Speaker B: Well, I mean, mister Stiller, if you want to come on the show and. [00:13:55] Speaker A: Defend yourself, we'll have you on. [00:13:58] Speaker B: Yeah, if you want to do issue three of man and wolf with us and outshine us, because obviously you're probably funnier than me. I just haven't never seen it. [00:14:09] Speaker A: Open invitation to mister Stiller, please come on the show. [00:14:13] Speaker B: Talk about man and something about Mary is one of the worst movies ever made. [00:14:20] Speaker A: I remember watching that at the. When the. When the south hill mall opened the new movie theater. Remember when that movie theater was brand new? Oh, my gosh. Well, you'd already moved away from the area. You had moved to the south. To the south. And I had come up from Longview to hang out with some friends from high school, and they're like, we're gonna go to the moon, the new movie theater. And we went and saw that movie was. Was playing for the first time, and I. I literally blocked the whole thing out. [00:14:58] Speaker B: Yeah, well, in all the Focker movies and all that, it's like, it's just so dumb. Everything he's in has to be a pun on something. Sex or something stupid, just to be like, dodgeball, basically. [00:15:10] Speaker A: Dodgeball. [00:15:14] Speaker B: Okay, so you're hitting hard here. All right. So I think even dodgeball, which is a movie, I love one. He is a character that everyone hates, right? And it still holds up to my top five. Like, every funny part for him is a site gag that could have been done by anybody. Like, anybody could be sitting, you know, being electrocuted while trying on their nads, while trying to eat pizza, right? Like, I mean, like, literally anybody could do that. Anybody could get in a suit with a codpiece and walk around, right? Like, again, it's just like, it was a great movie, but it's not a great movie because of him. [00:16:01] Speaker A: Fair. [00:16:03] Speaker B: And any person could have played. I shouldn't say any person could have played that part. But, like, it's all physical comedy, right? Like, I mean, if you. And it's just, like, not. And again, I guess we need a physical comedian in each generation. So maybe that's just it. [00:16:21] Speaker A: I mean, physical comedian, I mean, he's very physically. [00:16:24] Speaker B: Yeah, he is a very. He's a physical. Well, he's very physically fit. [00:16:28] Speaker A: He's a sight. Like. [00:16:30] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, I. Right. He's a chairman of the board. You can't have a Lucille ball and a penny Marshall in every generation. Right? So then, like, you know, obviously, when you have. You know. And by the way, if you don't know that Penny Marshall was a great physical comedian, just go back and watch episodes of Laverne and Shirley. Like, she was literally the next generation Lucille Ball before she went on to direct so many amazing movies like a league of their own. And so people know her as a director, but they underestimate her comedic ability, which was amazing. In fact, very similar career as Lucille Ball in the sense that, where Penny Marshall actually was directing. And I think Lucille Ball was more producing. Right. And then Penny Marshall went on to producing as well. But it's a very similar career path in the sense you had these great two crew comedians that were amazing at physical comedy that could map out a story and tell it. Where are the great Ben Stiller joint directed movies to show his prowess? [00:17:38] Speaker A: Ben Stiller, come on the show. Tell us what you know. [00:17:41] Speaker B: I don't know. Maybe I'll have to look this up, the listeners. If you want to prove me wrong, like, that's fine. I don't know how we got on a Ben Stiller ramp here. [00:17:48] Speaker A: Oh, because I. Because we were talking about, we were talking about Jack Black and dad. [00:17:55] Speaker B: He's directed a whole bunch of things. I'm about to look it up now. [00:17:58] Speaker A: We're talking about Jack Black. And then I brought up the Jack Black Ben Stiller movie. [00:18:03] Speaker B: Okay, you know what? I'm about to back down a little bit. He directly, he directed Tropics Thunder, which. He directed Tropic Thunder. Yeah. Well, again, okay, you know what? I have to give him credit for that one. Yeah. I mean, he did have Jack Black and Robert Downey junior to work off of. Right. So it's also got one of the most racist sight gags ever in any movie. [00:18:37] Speaker A: And Tom Cruise, the best. Tom Cruise. [00:18:41] Speaker B: Yeah. So you know what? Oh, shit. Oh, shit. [00:18:47] Speaker A: What? You find. [00:18:50] Speaker B: Ben Stiller directed the cable guy. [00:18:52] Speaker A: Uh huh. [00:18:54] Speaker B: Okay. However. Well, the secret life of Walter Mitte, which is a shit. [00:19:04] Speaker A: Oh, my gosh. [00:19:05] Speaker B: If you. [00:19:06] Speaker A: Okay, people, if you haven't seen that movie, it's a, it's a delightful flip film. It's a delightful film. [00:19:13] Speaker B: What? There's nothing in here for me. It's Ben Stiller, Kristen Wiig and John Daley. Like, no, thank you. Okay. He directed reality bites, which I. I wasn't. I didn't like that. [00:19:28] Speaker A: I didn't like it. [00:19:30] Speaker B: No, I'm sorry. [00:19:31] Speaker A: What? You didn't, you didn't like the. How. How real it was, how you could use your, your gas card to fill up people's tanks and then. [00:19:44] Speaker B: Yeah, I just, I don't know. I probably didn't watch it at the time. Yeah, yeah. It's 94. I, too, I was, like, busy. [00:19:54] Speaker A: I think. I think it was, it hit just a titch older than we were at the time. [00:20:00] Speaker B: When you watch it, he, and of course he directed Zoolander and Zoolander, two, which are pieces of shit. Wow. [00:20:09] Speaker A: Wow. Classic films. [00:20:15] Speaker B: Yeah. I've probably got a back off on Ben Stiller, though. I guess I just, I just, it makes my skin crawl when I see him in things so often. Unless, like, in a tropic thunder or a dodgeball where he's not like the main. Right. Or he's not the main. I don't know. He is the main in tropic thunder, though. Aha. Okay. I give him tropic thunder. [00:20:43] Speaker A: There was. I'll have to find it, and I'll send it to you. You'll. You'll be pleasantly surprised. [00:20:51] Speaker B: I'll give him tropic thunder. It's fine. [00:20:55] Speaker A: All right. I'm sorry for taking you down that road. That wasn't my intent. All I said was I. [00:21:00] Speaker B: Well, it's gonna be much more entertaining content watching me backtrack on my hatred of Ben Stiller than it is gonna cover this book. So. [00:21:09] Speaker A: It'S so funny because you're just like. You're. We're talking. We're doing the intro about Project Nerd and how, you know, the whole giant black thing. [00:21:19] Speaker B: Project nerd. [00:21:20] Speaker A: Project Dash nerd. [00:21:21] Speaker B: Sorry. [00:21:23] Speaker A: Project Dash nerd. That's like, when you have an underscore in your email address and people keep sending your email to the wrong email, and then you're like, it's underscore. It's not me. Underscore 20 at hobby.com. and then now I'm gonna get all these. All these emails to, like, this old, dead email address that I haven't used since college. [00:21:49] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. Well. Well, good for Ben Stiller. Well, yep, good for Ben Stiller. Okay. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I know. Soldier joke. I know, and I'm sorry. I'm just trying. I'm trying to get us back to the car. [00:22:10] Speaker A: We gotta get. It's a long way to get to the city of wolves, but we'll get there. We'll get there. [00:22:16] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:17] Speaker A: Giant trek, but I'm pretty sure that fake lobo can get us there on their speeder bike. What is that noise? Geez, Dan, what is that noise? [00:22:34] Speaker B: Well, you see, people decided to mow my lawn. [00:22:38] Speaker A: That's all. [00:22:38] Speaker B: I can hear the dogs now. Want to let me know that somebody's mowing the lawn? [00:22:43] Speaker A: It's like, where's. My fan's kicking in on my computer. [00:22:46] Speaker B: Well, Greg, why don't you talk about the COVID for a minute? [00:22:49] Speaker A: I will. I will tell you all about this fantastic cover that I'm gonna tell you about. I made Dan ANGRY. Everybody, we got. We got this amazing cover with. With the moon hunter and cap. It's CAp versus the malevolent moon Hunter on the moon Hunter MObile. I don't even know what to call it. It's like their. Their hover bike thing. And, you know, it's part two of six. That. That means that there's four MorE books that we're going to be covering, which dan is so excited about covering in this series. We are at issue 403. It's late July, so, you know, the moon is high in the sky, and we got guest starring Wolverine. That is. Right. Wolverine Here on the lower cover or the lower bottom right HAND side of THe COVID If I have my L's on One side, and that's where we got cap on THe top. And then we got my not l a backwards l on my other hand. I know that's where the wolverine is living. [00:23:53] Speaker B: And we have some more of this amazing Levin's art. Oh, yeah. [00:23:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:23:56] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. And you forgot to tell the listeners that these Captain America books were so amazing. We got them twice a MonTh. [00:24:06] Speaker A: TWo times, everybody. And. Yeah, that's one time too many. Two times too many. [00:24:15] Speaker B: That's two times too many. Well, you were. You were buying them, so you were telling them that we wanted more of us buying them. [00:24:23] Speaker A: Yes, we got them. We got. We got them because you. Yes. They kept giving us more and more because I was buying them. Oh, boy. [00:24:32] Speaker B: It's your fault. Singularly. [00:24:34] Speaker A: Singularly. Yes. [00:24:35] Speaker B: Well, we flip the page and we have Steve Rogers, born in the USA, raised to cherish the ideals of democracy, endowed with a superhuman physique. You know, when I see the words endowed with. [00:24:50] Speaker A: Yes. [00:24:52] Speaker B: In general, I don't expect the words of superhuman physique to come after that. [00:24:59] Speaker A: Yes. [00:25:00] Speaker B: Like endowed with courage. Endowed with courage or endowed with humor. Humor, yeah. Endowed with amazing calves. I don't know, like something amazing. [00:25:17] Speaker A: Kneecaps. [00:25:19] Speaker B: Yeah. And then driven to be the most capable combatant in the world. Now, as both alone, both lone crusader and leader of the renowned Avengers, he fights an ongoing battle for liberty, justice and the american dream. [00:25:34] Speaker A: Captain America, city of wolves. Can you hear the barking in the background? Yes. You can? [00:25:41] Speaker B: Yeah, we're ready. [00:25:43] Speaker A: Dogs, what's up? Whoop. Whoop. I. Yeah, I know. The dogs are excited because it's city of Wolf's time and they want to get there with the moon hunter. They want to go. They're like, moon hunter, take us away because they're. [00:26:04] Speaker B: Yeah, they're like. [00:26:05] Speaker A: They don't want to be. They don't want to be dragged away like the wolf that just got roped up. [00:26:10] Speaker B: Well, we pick up where we did last issue with the moon hunters strangling and trying to hang a werewolf. We've got, which I understand are not the main ways you kill werewolves. In fact, I understand you killed them with silver bullets. And shit. Okay. Well, anyway, we, we learn all about John Jameson again. John Jameson's missing. There were some werewolf murders. We get a little recap here. Definitely needed a big recap because we, it comes out twice a week, but it's good for them to catch people up. It also lets us know that Mark Grunwald is still the writer, Rick Levins is still the end. They're the wear writer and wear pencil. Now, I wish that were true. Which would mean that they could only write and draw after dark. And then that would mean if we were going to put out this many books, they'd have to get another writer and artist to do more of them. But they didn't. So I don't think these things are true. [00:27:03] Speaker A: They could only do it during a full moon, so that's even harder. [00:27:08] Speaker B: Yeah, well, Danny Bolonotti is the where inker, Joe Rosen is the where letterer. Gina going is the wear colorist. Ralph Macchio is the shitty wear editor who never gives us any editorial notes at all. And Tom DeFalco was the is. Was. It says was editor in chief. [00:27:25] Speaker A: So what does that mean? He's not editor in chief anymore? Dun dun dun. [00:27:29] Speaker B: I don't know. I don't know. I mean, that could be true. We'll have to wait till the next episode. I mean, he's too busy cloning Spider man, so. [00:27:38] Speaker A: Oh, my gosh. [00:27:40] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, I took a. That's a. That was a big process, right? [00:27:43] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, it's a. It's a thing. It's a whole entire thing you gotta get through and figure out. So. Boom, boom. [00:27:55] Speaker B: Yeah. I gotta look up who even wrote that. I gotta make sure I'm right. But anyway, who wrote it was him. I don't think he wrote it. Wasn't he just the editor, or was it actually him? No, it was him. [00:28:06] Speaker A: It was him. It came from his mind. [00:28:07] Speaker B: That's not wrong. [00:28:08] Speaker A: It was his mind. [00:28:09] Speaker B: I was not wrong. I was not wrong. You know, there's sometimes I'm not wrong. [00:28:14] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:28:14] Speaker B: And this is one of them. [00:28:15] Speaker A: I mean, for the first 20 minutes of the podcast, you were right. You were wrong, but this time you're right. [00:28:20] Speaker B: That is not true. That is not true. [00:28:22] Speaker A: I don't know, listeners, you chime in later and tell us if Dan was right. [00:28:25] Speaker B: Technically, I was correct because. No, technically I was correct because I said that Lucille Ball started out of his physical comedian and then it went on to produce movies. I said, hang on, hang on. [00:28:38] Speaker A: Stop. [00:28:40] Speaker B: I said that Penny Marshall started out as a physical comedian and an actress and went on to direct and then produce movies. [00:28:48] Speaker A: Yeah, that is correct, too. But. [00:28:50] Speaker B: And I said that Ben Stiller did not do that. And, in fact, I was correct, because Ben Stiller started out directing movies and then went on to act in them and then went back to directing and acting in them. So his career was actually backwards of them because he was directing movies all the way back in 1994. So I was technically correct. So if you want to argue with that, that's fine, but you would be wrong, because I'm looking at the dates right here. So his career, in fact, did not go in the same pattern as Lucille Ball and Penny Marshall, which was the point I was making. [00:29:25] Speaker A: I don't think that was the point. [00:29:26] Speaker B: I may have been wrong about some of the. [00:29:27] Speaker A: I don't think that was technically. [00:29:28] Speaker B: I may have been wrong about some of the fine points I may have been wrong about some of the fine points there. [00:29:33] Speaker A: I don't think that was the technical point you were making at first. I think you pivoted to the point when you realized there was no point you could make at that point. Point that you're making. The point you're trying to make. [00:29:43] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:29:43] Speaker A: And now you made is the point that you're making. [00:29:47] Speaker B: So. No, I just. I just. The point was I was technically correct whether you want. What are we, a court on intent now? Like, are you prosecuting me on tape? Just like Captain America is prosecuting the moon. Whatever the guy. Fake Lobo. Shitty loboomone catcher. Yeah. [00:30:05] Speaker A: Moon beam catcher. [00:30:06] Speaker B: You know, it's like, I love the fact that we have shitty Lobo and shitty bane in the same issue. [00:30:10] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah. I love that. That is pretty cool. It's like. It's a twofer. It's nice. [00:30:16] Speaker B: Even though Bane came later, but this is definitely. [00:30:20] Speaker A: Well, they're both very not good. [00:30:24] Speaker B: Well, anyway, we get Captain America. Well, again, we go to the page two and Captain America say, who in the world? And we agree. Who in the world is this? [00:30:34] Speaker A: Who is this? [00:30:35] Speaker B: Like, somebody thought this, you know. You know what it is? Dead pool. Lobo. [00:30:42] Speaker A: Dead pool. [00:30:42] Speaker B: Yeah, Lobo. Dead Lobo. [00:30:45] Speaker A: Pool. Yeah, it's a. It's a nice. [00:30:46] Speaker B: It's a nice cross. [00:30:48] Speaker A: Cross pollination of the two. [00:30:51] Speaker B: What if the silver surfer was a badass space what if the silver surfer was a badass space biker? [00:30:58] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. [00:30:58] Speaker B: Who was stranded on Earth and his space bike was stranded on Earth, and then he decided to capture werewolves? [00:31:05] Speaker A: I like it. Make a comic about it. Call it man wolf catcher. [00:31:11] Speaker B: Yeah, man. And man and. [00:31:12] Speaker A: Man and wolf moon beamer. [00:31:14] Speaker B: Man. And what if he's man and wolf catcher? [00:31:16] Speaker A: Man and wolf catcher Moonbeamer? And the. And one of your. One of your weapons is a brass knuckle with. With pointy things. [00:31:26] Speaker B: Well, the important things that happen in the next couple pages is the moon moonbeam. Moon sunshine. Moon zappa. Moon Zappa captures the werewolf moon hunter. And then. Oh. Hunter moon hunter's moon. Moon hunter hunter moon. I think it's like Hunter moon. He was definitely, like a baby of the nineties when all that hunter, you know, everybody's name was Hunter Hunter Moon. I had all the hunters in colleges later. Yeah, it's good. Yeah, yeah. All the hunters, all the moons, all the hunters. Not so many of the moons, just the hunters. [00:32:04] Speaker A: Okay, so, soliloquy, moon fry. [00:32:07] Speaker B: I do think Hunter moon is a better name than moon hunter hunter. [00:32:10] Speaker A: Moon hunter moon fry. [00:32:12] Speaker B: Yeah, it's a little bit less in your face. You know, it's a little bit more subtle. He's a hunter, and it's in the moon time. As opposed to it's a moon and then you hunter. Or if he is moon hunter, does that mean he searches the world for people who are dropping their trousers and showing their backsides? [00:32:34] Speaker A: I'm looking for moons. [00:32:36] Speaker B: Or is he just looking in the sky all the time? Like, where's the moon? [00:32:42] Speaker A: I don't see the moon. [00:32:45] Speaker B: I mean, maybe they should just call him werewolf hunter because that's what he does. Or wolf hunter. [00:32:50] Speaker A: Well, I mean, that's too on the. [00:32:52] Speaker B: He doesn't, like, physically hunt moons. [00:32:54] Speaker A: That's. That's so on the nose, though. Werewolf hunter. [00:32:58] Speaker B: Well, I mean, his name sucks already, so why not go with a name that's moon hunter? [00:33:05] Speaker A: I mean, moon hunter sounds cool, though. It's like, you know, you hunt. [00:33:08] Speaker B: Well, Captain America goes in back and finds shitty doctor. [00:33:12] Speaker A: Yeah, Doctor Doctor weirdo. [00:33:16] Speaker B: Shitty shitty doctor strange. [00:33:17] Speaker A: Doctor weirdo. [00:33:19] Speaker B: We have so many, like, we have so many, like, off shitty lobo. We have shitty bane. We have shitty doctor strange strange. Go, bots. Doctor strange. That's what I said. [00:33:29] Speaker A: When you go to, like, the dollar tree and you get off, like, the off brand items, you're like, oh, hey. [00:33:41] Speaker B: It'S the best is if you get the. What is the scrub daddy? Yeah, you get, like, the off brand scrub daddy. Oh, it's where the holes are somewhere else instead of the eyes. I want you to think about that. [00:33:59] Speaker A: Okay? [00:34:01] Speaker B: Just hold it right here and you can scrub your dishes. [00:34:04] Speaker A: Interesting. [00:34:06] Speaker B: Yeah, it's shaped like an eggplant. Or something, or. No, it's shaped like peaches. [00:34:10] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:34:11] Speaker B: Yeah, just hold. It's peach shaped, and then there's a hole. Right. Somewhere that you can hold, just like the scrub daddy eyes. It's not. Yeah, well, you got to have a hole in there to hold it. Otherwise it's not really. [00:34:25] Speaker A: You don't need two fingers. You need one. [00:34:28] Speaker B: Yeah. It keeps it simpler. Yeah. It's the dollar store version. They couldn't afford to make two holes in it, so. Yeah, I mean, it's just. There's a lot of dime store things. Yeah, well, we'll have to call them dollar store. We're way past dime stores, and now the dollar store is even. Dollar store. Right. It's like, it's gonna be the five. [00:34:45] Speaker A: Dollar store in a couple years or if they're still around. [00:34:47] Speaker B: What's the Japanese. What's. That's the japanese dollar store that you and Anne took me to. Daiso. Yeah, but they're. I think. I think everything I bought from Daiso is trash, except for, like, one thing. I'm trying to remember what it was. I think it was the. Oh, I bought some, like, wall sticker cats or something. Gave them to my roommate. Not Paul. Not jujitsu lawyer Paul. He did not want wall sticky. [00:35:12] Speaker A: Wall sticky cats. [00:35:15] Speaker B: But, yeah, I mean. Well, anyway, the druid is taking a short rest. [00:35:25] Speaker A: Yes. [00:35:27] Speaker B: And then moon Daddy, Daddy, moon, moon Daddy takes the werewolf. Yeah. Moon Daddy, moon Daddy takes the werewolf. [00:35:36] Speaker A: Got the werewolf riding on the back. [00:35:39] Speaker B: Sky bites. Yeah. And then he. Then Captain America decides to fly his shitty sky bike after him. I hate the sky bike. It's so stupid. [00:35:51] Speaker A: But, man, they're having a whole sky biker moment. It's like, hey, man, why can't he. [00:36:00] Speaker B: Just ride a motorcycle like he did in the seventies? [00:36:03] Speaker A: It's true. But, I mean, it's the. They're in the future, man. They're riding. They're riding. [00:36:09] Speaker B: They're not in the future. It's 1982, Lake Dan. [00:36:13] Speaker A: They're in the future of their. Their future from. [00:36:19] Speaker B: Well, how does his sky bike stay in the sky? Like, I don't understand stuff. [00:36:24] Speaker A: Magnets, man, and it's magical. [00:36:28] Speaker B: Oh, God. Now we're back to the. I think we had this discussion before with the magnets. Yeah. I'm not giving that rap group anymore airplay on my podcast. [00:36:38] Speaker A: How he does it, I'll tell you. He uses. I've seen this in the back of. [00:36:43] Speaker B: I say the words rap group loosely. Sorry. I just want to add that I understand. [00:36:47] Speaker A: I've seen this in. In the comic books before. He gets a couple of vacuum cleaners, and he hooks them all up, and with the vacuum cleaners blowing at the same time, at the same rate, it creates. [00:37:01] Speaker B: No, we read that story. That and ascent. He wrote, like, daredevil and him went and found that guy who made the car, and then they got. They lost all that technology. But he had the sky thing before that. Like, that's. [00:37:15] Speaker A: Yeah, it runs on harmony, man. [00:37:20] Speaker B: Well, we get some amazing sot dialogue here as Shittilobo sneaks, besides captain behind Captain America and shoots toward him. And while he's doing, he says, right up your tailpipe, shield thrower. Like, why does he call him shield thrower? Is that captain? Have you ever seen. I mean, I don't read a lot of Captain America comic books, so you're gonna have to let me know. Is that a normal thing that villains call him? [00:37:45] Speaker A: Well, he throws his shield, man. He cap throws his shield. That's what he does. He throw his shield. He throws it like a giant, fragile. [00:37:57] Speaker B: Flip to the next page. And let's talk about. Let's talk about this fantastic art as Captain America is flying out of the sky and trying to grab moon daddy's sky cycle. [00:38:09] Speaker A: Sky bike. [00:38:11] Speaker B: His bike. His Lobo bike. His lobo bike. So let's look at that. He sees holding the shield, the back of the shield. Does that not look like the jankiest piece of garbage you've ever seen? [00:38:24] Speaker A: It looks like what I see at conventions all the time. [00:38:29] Speaker B: There we go. Perfect. That's. You know what? Yeah, I can't even top that. So anyway, Captain America tries to, like, hit him and tell him he owes him a new sky news guy cycle. [00:38:42] Speaker A: You jerk. [00:38:43] Speaker B: And then. And then for the next page, Papamoon talks about everything on his body that is padded. [00:38:52] Speaker A: Good thing I'm padded. [00:38:55] Speaker B: I have a paddock mask. Good thing I'm padded elsewhere. [00:38:58] Speaker A: Yeah, I'm so padded up, you can't me. [00:39:01] Speaker B: Sorry. My mug ain't all that's padded. So what are you packing down there, buddy? Okay, so now we know. [00:39:10] Speaker A: Got a soft pack. [00:39:12] Speaker B: Yeah, apparently had to stuff some tissues down there, right? Like, it's. That's. He's definitely not Lobo now. We know he's shitty lobo now. I don't think the main man is. Is padding down there. [00:39:26] Speaker A: You know, this moon daddy is definitely wanting to, you know, show. [00:39:37] Speaker B: You know, think about this. There is somebody out in the world where Moon Hunter is their favorite villain in all of Captain America comics. [00:39:46] Speaker A: Oh. [00:39:49] Speaker B: Wait, does he have, like, razor wire hair? [00:39:54] Speaker A: Maybe it does look like. It does look like it's a hair of. Maybe not razor wire, but definitely, like, barbed wire. [00:40:07] Speaker B: Do you think that he pads his hair? [00:40:15] Speaker A: Maybe. I don't know. [00:40:18] Speaker B: He definitely has padded shoulders, so he's in trend. And he has pockets. [00:40:23] Speaker A: Pockets. [00:40:26] Speaker B: Well, anyway, he managed just to knock Captain America off the bike, and he falls down and goes boom. And the end of the story. Captain America's dead. We don't have to read anymore. What? [00:40:38] Speaker A: Oh, no. [00:40:39] Speaker B: Yeah. So then we get welcome to Starks Burrow sign. Population, a nice place to live. Population 932. And Wolverine is inconspicuously hiding under the sign he. Wolverine sort of hides. Like my dog does see me, right? Yeah, you can't see me. [00:41:01] Speaker A: Like, I can't see your dog. [00:41:04] Speaker B: Now, my dog went hunting and actually did something really bad. [00:41:07] Speaker A: Oh, no. [00:41:09] Speaker B: Yeah, well, I mean, she was fine. [00:41:12] Speaker A: Oh, no. Oh, no. [00:41:17] Speaker B: So she was doing some backyard hunting yesterday. I was not home. Yeah. So anyway, yeah, well, she is a bird and game dog. [00:41:28] Speaker A: Yeah. Got something. [00:41:31] Speaker B: It's not a bird or game, at least. So anyway, poor. And she's little. She can get places. [00:41:40] Speaker A: Another. Another lady walking down the street. Her walker. Oh, no. [00:41:49] Speaker B: Well, maybe she became. Maybe she got some of this werewolf blood in there. I don't know. [00:41:54] Speaker A: No. Now you're gonna have moonbeam coming in. [00:41:57] Speaker B: Well, moon Moon daddy comes back with his cycle, and he tells Gary and Mike to fuel it up and check out the throttle. [00:42:08] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:42:09] Speaker B: And Gary and Mike go, ra, ra, ra. And then kind of like, was going on at my house earlier. And then we get inside and some lady is working on a different werewolf, and they bring another lady werewolf back, and they're like, ah, we didn't recognize this one. They're like, okay, bring that one here. And then. Because we need to have parallel scenes. [00:42:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:42:37] Speaker B: Mister Dunphy, the wrestler guy. [00:42:40] Speaker A: Yes. [00:42:41] Speaker B: Is just on a thing at Avengers mansion, I guess. Or Captain America mansion, I guess Avengers mansion, probably Avengers headquarters now. Okay. And Jarvis just walks in right in the middle of his doctor's appointment, which violates all sorts of federal law. [00:42:58] Speaker A: Yeah, but I mean, then again, maybe it's okay. Maybe he was invited. [00:43:03] Speaker B: And then they have this talk about what happened to the wrestler guy when he was in the arctic waters. Did that affect his brain? Did he have amnesia? I don't know. [00:43:13] Speaker A: Could have. [00:43:14] Speaker B: Also, I would just say, too, the whole thing that's disrupted our podcast today. The lawn people came when it's pouring down rain, which is always another good time to mow the lawn. It probably shouldn't have happened at all. But anyway, we've got some great things happening. Jarvis is like, man, I wonder if Captain America is going to insist that we take care of this guy forever. Wow, Jarvis. What a dick. [00:43:42] Speaker A: Oh, Jarvis. [00:43:46] Speaker B: Yeah, like, okay, my bad. He should have quit way back during streets of poison. Or not streets of poison. That was. No, during. During. When Tony was drunk, during that, demon in a bottle. Could have left and had a. Yeah, Jarvis could have left and had a whole amazing career, you know, a whole amazing life. [00:44:09] Speaker A: You take that. Take his. His. He had all that money that was coming. [00:44:16] Speaker B: Well, he must have had some really good in stock options from stark Industries. And he sold his stock. [00:44:21] Speaker A: Yeah. So he actually. Well, he. Remember he had to sell the stock because his mom or his parent. [00:44:27] Speaker B: Oh, that's right. So Tony is just an asshole and doesn't give him any stock in the company. [00:44:33] Speaker A: Yeah, he was a placeholder. [00:44:36] Speaker B: That's how they keep him around. He's like their slave. [00:44:38] Speaker A: Oh, indentured servitude. It's terrible. [00:44:43] Speaker B: That's not cool. Well, we do flash back to Massachusetts, and Captain America goes back in the woods after he falls into some trees to make sure he doesn't die. [00:44:52] Speaker A: Smart. [00:44:53] Speaker B: It's unfortunate now without the super soldier serum running through his body, he's just an ordinary human who's really, really buff, who fell out of the sky into some trees and managed to just land and be fine. [00:45:08] Speaker A: Yeah, typical, normal, average stuff. Captain America. Tele buff. [00:45:16] Speaker B: Okay, so. Well, okay, well, anyway, he finds Doctor Druid, who's laying down in the earth, communing with it. Like a good druid, getting my power back. [00:45:31] Speaker A: He's got crystals all around him. [00:45:33] Speaker B: Yes. [00:45:34] Speaker A: He's bringing in the powers and the potions. Yeah. [00:45:40] Speaker B: And then he's like, I heard an explosion. Yeah, my sky cycle blew up. Some more exposition here. Meanwhile, back at the hall of justice. [00:45:50] Speaker A: Really? [00:45:51] Speaker B: In Starksboro? Yeah. Master, are you in here? And it's the woman who is working on the guys looking for the unnamed master who has one of those moon crystal. Moon gem. Yeah, he's talking about its arcane potential and all this stuff. Okay, sweet. That's exciting. We flipped the page and they finished their discussion without really telling us anything. [00:46:18] Speaker A: Nothing at all. [00:46:19] Speaker B: And then Wolverine shows up and he's flipping the table. [00:46:24] Speaker A: He's flipping a werewolf. [00:46:27] Speaker B: Yeah, Wolverine is about as subtle as my dog hunting in the open. Yeah, he just walks right out. So, Wolverine, I don't know if he's ever been a great strategist, but he generally doesn't just, like, walk out into the open and have people start beating him up, either. Unless he's got, like, a team around him or it's like a plan. [00:46:46] Speaker A: Yeah, he's just like. He goes out there and he's just. [00:46:48] Speaker B: Right. [00:46:48] Speaker A: Direct shop. [00:46:50] Speaker B: And of course, he's wearing the yellow and blue because we're in that era of the x Men. [00:46:54] Speaker A: Right. [00:46:55] Speaker B: It's really sad when Jim Lee's drawing you in another book and you're being drawn by Rick Levins here. [00:47:07] Speaker A: I would say as a kid, I didn't understand how. I mean, like, I got that there was different artists, but I was, like, I always, like, would irk me because I didn't understand how he would look so different. And why does he look different in this book? [00:47:23] Speaker B: One, Jim Lee is about to leave anyway, but go to some image company thing. But, yeah, well, I don't know. We get to the next page, and Wolverine just grousing about how he has to beat everybody up too many. And. And Shittilobo comes and shoots him full of Tranx, but it looks like he's firing a gun at him. But if he is firing a gun at him, then he doesn't really hurt Wolverine. But it does. Somehow it takes him out, and he doesn't have any scars or scrapes on him. So I guess it could have been a gun, and they just didn't want to show the gun art and stuff. [00:48:05] Speaker A: Yeah, didn't want to. Anyway, effect. [00:48:11] Speaker B: We find out that Moonbeam tells him to take him to Doc Nightshade. So I don't know who Doc Nightshade is. Do you? [00:48:17] Speaker A: I think might be the doctor that we saw working on the werewolf. [00:48:22] Speaker B: Okay, so is it the lady, or was it the mask? The guy that's like. [00:48:27] Speaker A: I think it's the lady. [00:48:29] Speaker B: Grenwald's real thing is to just have these villains sort of shadowed and hidden in the background. Right. So we don't know who they are. [00:48:35] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:48:36] Speaker B: It's just to keep the mystery going. Like, we're just dying to find out who has these great cast of characters around them. [00:48:44] Speaker A: Magneto. [00:48:44] Speaker B: I mean, when you have a character that's worse than Grimbor the Chainsman in your book. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it is grim, boy. [00:48:54] Speaker A: The chainsmith. [00:48:59] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't think it may. Hmm. That would be interesting. If it wasn't shitty lobo became Grimbor the chainsman. That. That would be a turn of events. [00:49:09] Speaker A: Takes off everything. Grimbor. [00:49:11] Speaker B: That. That. That would be. I mean, I'd stick around for that, actually. [00:49:15] Speaker A: Yeah. Surprise, everybody. It's me. [00:49:20] Speaker B: Well, Captain America and Druid Deathmeister walk through the woods. And Captain America asked Doctor Druid if he wants to take a rest before sunup. And of course, as a druid he should say, definitely, I want to take a short rest and restore my spell slots. But he says no. He's been invigorated by the walk across a bridge, across the bridges of Madison county. So they're just kind of like rolling through. And then they get to the center of town there and all these werewolves surround them. And we get told it's going to conclude in two weeks. [00:50:02] Speaker A: No. [00:50:04] Speaker B: And then we, and then it keeps going, oh, gosh. [00:50:08] Speaker A: Diamondback. [00:50:10] Speaker B: And we get our second story. Diamondback. Taken to the task. Taken to the test at the task master, the taskmasters Academy of Criminal Arts and Sciences somewhere in Pennsylvania. So, like, first off, Mark Grunwald did the story. Larry Alexander is on pencils. Arianne. Ariane. Yeah, Arian. Okay. Is on inks and colors. They're like Bono. [00:50:40] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:50:42] Speaker B: Steve Durrow is on letters and Ralph Macchio is the editor. Now I did have some questions for you. As we look at this continually flat art, even though it's done by another pencil. My first question sort of was this. Do you think that Taskmasters Academy of Criminal Arts and Sciences, do you think that they have, they take federal financial aid so you, can you, can you get funding financial aid to go there? [00:51:18] Speaker A: Yes, it's a, I think, I think they're running some sort of, they've, they've got it put through. So it pops up as a kind of like a community college type thing, like a shell. And you could go there and it looks like you're taking some sort of like legit classes in college work. It looks like you're gonna get away with an aa or something like that, you know, and, but Taskmaster is gonna get, get all the money and everything and then you're gonna walk away. [00:51:52] Speaker B: Oh, so it's like University of Phoenix. [00:51:54] Speaker A: Yeah. Accredited institutions. Right. [00:51:58] Speaker B: So accredited. Yeah. [00:52:00] Speaker A: Who. [00:52:01] Speaker B: Now who, that brings another question then who accredits the Taskmakers? Taskmasters Academy of Criminal Arts. [00:52:09] Speaker A: Who does? We just know that it's accredited. Okay. Just like the art colleges that are accredited. And you, you spend all the money to take classes to get your degree from the accredited school. You know, I have a lot of friends that went to art, the art institute. Institute that it was accredited. I mean, we, we've all heard. [00:52:34] Speaker B: Okay, well, we don't know. Okay, well, we've all heard these stories of institutions. Well, he. He gets. He. He starts out with a little spoken brochure about his college. He notes that he. He only accepts street punks, neighborhood tough guys, and gangsta. Oh, gangsta. Gangsta. [00:52:59] Speaker A: Wannabes. [00:53:00] Speaker B: Wannabes. I've always. The task ma in the Taskmasters. Taskmasters history, gangsta is definitely one of the words I thought, like, fits the character. [00:53:12] Speaker A: Yeah. I always thought when I think Taskmaster and who the Taskmaster is, what kind of character the Taskmaster has been portrayed as. Definitely the vernacular that the Taskmaster bust out being. [00:53:31] Speaker B: It's a very. [00:53:33] Speaker A: Well, I mean, you know, taskmaster for those don't know. He's like a trained assassin. He's probably like a. Just at that point of, like, being. Could be the best bad guy, but not quite the best bad guy because always. Always getting his. [00:53:49] Speaker B: Well, he was introduced in. He was introduced in an event 195 in 1980 by our good friend David Michelinie, back from karate kid, and, of course, demon in a bottle, Iron man. He was originally John by George Perez. If George Perez looked at the art here, he would be weeping from heaven. [00:54:14] Speaker A: Because he's like, why is this character so poorly done? Well, I mean, when you look at him on paper, right. Not. Not this, but, like. But character wise, I mean, he's. He has all the makings of being. You know, he's. He's got the sub tributes. He's got the. The makings of being one of these types of people who has an operator's background, knows the in and outs of all the different agencies and other things like that, and has the different types of skill sets that one would need to. To work within the different. The Alphabet soups. But, yeah, he's taken all those skills and things and. Oh, yeah, see, that's really good. [00:55:00] Speaker B: I took this costume, which looks kind of janky to me, but then I just pulled up the Avengers 195 version of the costume drawn by George. [00:55:07] Speaker A: Yeah, that's fantastic. Look at the depth and the detail. And then you look at this flat, flat drawing. It looks like a. Looks like something you'd get at a Halloween store for a wall. [00:55:19] Speaker B: Yeah, actually, yeah. Is this. This is like the. What is the Halloween store called? [00:55:25] Speaker A: Like, the Spirit version. [00:55:27] Speaker B: This is like the spirit version of the Taskmaster. [00:55:30] Speaker A: Hey, kids. We have. We have the master of the task costume. [00:55:33] Speaker B: We've got master task. [00:55:34] Speaker A: We got master task. If you're looking for a costume, favorite super baddie. He only accepts gangsta wannabes. Gangsta wannabes in his school. [00:55:49] Speaker B: I also feel like the original taskmaster drawing was, like, a tryout, and then George Perez was like, yeah, I don't like all the white in there. So with Deathstroke, I'll just go more with the blue and the orange later. [00:56:01] Speaker A: Yeah, definitely. [00:56:06] Speaker B: Yeah. Well, anyway, now, generally a good editor, if we had a good one, but we don't because we've established that from the last story, would note somewhere on this page that this is a flashback, because I have no idea who these people are. As the story progresses, I'm gonna find out that this is not right now. [00:56:34] Speaker A: Oh, this is a flashback, huh? Cool. [00:56:38] Speaker B: Right? But there's nothing here at all to indicate that this is five years ago, Ralph, or. Yeah, at all. And nothing. So. And they're dressed not. I don't. Well, they're dressed pretty, like, standard clothing for the time, so. [00:56:56] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:56:59] Speaker B: It'S not like the addressed appearance of the characters. Like, put them back in time. Well, we flipped a page, and we have a woman, and she's thinking, a woman with larger breasts than all the other women is thinking. Boy, am I glad I heard about this place. Now that mom and my brothers are all gone, I've got to learn to take care of myself. And nowhere else is there opportunity for hitting it rich for someone of my limited skills than as a career criminal. [00:57:38] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:57:41] Speaker B: So we're going to find out who this character is in a few minutes, but I just want to tell you, everything I have said about this character and our entire interactions with them has come true. They've said it themselves. And. And also, let's applaud Mark Grunwald for really hitting a home run with the dialogue right here. [00:58:01] Speaker A: Fair enough. Okay. [00:58:03] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, look at that. Like, just letting the whole world know that those of limited skills definitely should always turn to a life of crime and limited skills. All criminals just have limited skills, you know, it's always. Yeah. And the woman is standing there with all these others, and she asks another character, like, wonder if our uniforms are going to be as Halloween y as the instructors? That's an insult to my birthday. They need to take it back. [00:58:38] Speaker A: Take it back. [00:58:39] Speaker B: So anyway, we get introduced to Blanche, the calisthenics instructor, and she puts everybody through the ringer. Our main. Our main character has changed from wearing a pink outfit to a white outfit. Or. Wait, is that the. Yeah, I don't. I'm so confused. Okay, well, the coloring is way fucked up, and the. And the. In the outfit has changed to, like. Anyway, the point of all this is then walks in a purple belt to train them. And we find out that's Mister Brock. [00:59:24] Speaker A: Eddie Brock. [00:59:27] Speaker B: Is it? [00:59:28] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:59:28] Speaker B: I don't think so. Just Mister Brock, the punk who killed my brother. Okay, so she leaves and she gets. Well, she gets beat up by her other person, and then she leaves and then goes and, like, cuts her hair and stuff. And then we transition to find out that this is a flashback, maybe. We actually don't know. We think it's the same. Oh, no, she tells us because she's dreaming about it. Yeah. Okay. So we finally get, oh, I was just dreaming. Reliving my first day at the academy. We find out it's diamondback and that crossbones is back to give her some food and is like, basically, you've got to show me something. Some training if you want to get more. So next we get the final exam. What the fuck is this? [01:00:34] Speaker A: You know. [01:00:38] Speaker B: I mean, you read it the first time it came out, and you're reading it again. Now. Explain. Was this appealing to people? Like, I don't like. I'm not a big fan of women in captivity in, like, this at all. It doesn't seem to be going anywhere. Is crossbones now gonna, like, force her to train and become a super assassin? [01:01:02] Speaker A: It seems like that's what he's trying to do. He's trying to get her to train with him in this. In this lockdown place. [01:01:10] Speaker B: And how did this moron end up at this school of supervillains to begin with? Right? Like, again, did she get a scholarship, a good financial aid package? Was there an outreach to get her there? If she's so dumb and has no skills, how did she even find this place to begin with? Was she running around with some dynamic underworld that hooked her into this? Like, if her mom died, her brother was killed. Did she then just run around with some folks that referred her to the school for supervillains? Where? What the. What the fuck is happening? Like, I don't understand. [01:01:48] Speaker A: She was out and about. She saw a flyer attached to a light pole, had a terror take one of these, and she called the number on a payphone that's, you know, payphone back in the day. She put her. Her money in, called the number. It said, meet at this place. She went there and got another number to call another place and then call that place, and they got an address and then went to another place and then showed up at the school and then started the training. And I think she's putting two or two together that. That the guy with the purple belt was the guy that killed her brother, as we find out. But then I think she thinks maybe crossbones might be that guy. [01:02:36] Speaker B: Well, we have a letter page here. [01:02:39] Speaker A: Ow. Letter page. I love this letter page. [01:02:42] Speaker B: And I'm gonna read, one by one, Michael J. Barr. Not to be confused with Michael W. Bar, Michael Jaye Barr from 55717 Hummingbird Lane, Naperville, Illinois 60540. If you want to write mister Barr. Mister Barr. I'm sure he'll still be hanging around at that address. So he says. Issue 396 was the first issue since 386 that caught my interest. I usually enjoy reading Mark's work, but in the past ten issues, it waned. But like I said, 396 was pretty cool. A new Jack o lantern. All right. I wish we could have that here. I always liked the character. Then Jack became hop goblin, and there was no Jack. I'm glad to see a new one. Blackwing. How much dust did you wipe off this guy? I can't remember the last time I saw him. And I'm glad to see a totally underused character make an appearance. Assuming this is the same old blackwing, then the skull's mansion was Silvermane's house. I don't even know what's happening right now. Since Blackwing is Silvermane's son, how this all fits fits in is beyond me. Except for the fact that Red Skull and Silvermane were active in Hydra a long time ago. I still can't over get over seeing this guy. Since I've always liked Taskmaster, it's great seeing him again. His training of cutthroat is interesting. I think over time, cutthroat will turn out to be a formidable villain. I know cutthroat has gone down in history as being amazing, but here's the important part of the letter I wanted to share. Rachel Layton. You remember her? We just saw it. We're reading about her has turned so boring, it's pathetic. She used to be fun and outgoing. Right now, you can't even tell. She used to be a costume hero villain. Her relationship with Cap is stagnant. How about a return to the old Rachel? He wants a return to Diamondback. I don't know how. Maybe that's what they're doing. Finally, there's cap. A couple of issues I question myself. Why read Captain America? I'd grown tired of him. Then when I read infinity gauntlet, I regained a new respect for Cap. And I think I'll never lose. When Thanos was ready to strike cap. Cap showed no fear. Thanos, who had the power of a God, did not make Cap submit to fear. So the important thing about this letter to remember is there was nothing in this book that made him want to read Captain America again. He actually picked it up because he read about Captain America in another book. [01:05:02] Speaker A: Yes. [01:05:03] Speaker B: So, yeah, I mean, that's where we're picking up. And you listeners wanted us to read this. Another thing I'll highlight in the letter columns is that we had some backup stories with Bad Girls, Inc. Which was the new superhero group for Diamondback, which we mentioned in the last time we talked about Captain America. Because why can't we call him werewolf Hunter if we're going to call a superhero group with x super villains in it that are girls. Bad Girls, Inc. I mean, that seems pretty on the nose, too. Uh. I hate this so fucking much. [01:05:46] Speaker A: What? The whole book. I find it. [01:05:49] Speaker B: All of this. Oh, I hate all of this. All of it. It is. I fall asleep reading these issues. I had to read issue two twice. No, three times, because I kept falling asleep. I'm now trying to read issue three twice. It says, next issue at war with werewolves. Plus the Star Spangled Avenger against the feral mutant. [01:06:15] Speaker A: Nice. [01:06:17] Speaker B: Guess who wins. [01:06:18] Speaker A: Wrong. [01:06:21] Speaker B: And then we get an advertisement for the fucking punisher at the bottom of the page. So to tap to, to. To cap this off, to cap it off. No pun intended. Yeah, no pun intended. We get an advertisement for a character I hate almost more than any other character, which is about right for the era and timeframe. Additionally, they called the letter page american graffiti. Yeah, I hope. I hope they sued the hell out of them for this. [01:06:56] Speaker A: Ron Howard is like, I hope Ron. [01:07:00] Speaker B: Howard sued the hell out of them for sullying the name of a great piece of american cinema. What was that? [01:07:12] Speaker A: Was that a car? That was perfect timing for american graffiti. [01:07:19] Speaker B: Like a car. [01:07:19] Speaker A: Just rip it in the background. [01:07:21] Speaker B: My neighbors are on point. They have to. Yeah, they have to show how much padding they need by revving their engine. [01:07:30] Speaker A: Oh boy. They are moon hunters. [01:07:35] Speaker B: Yes. They are padded. Just like Moon Hunter, Moon duggar, moon beam, sunshine. Yeah. Well, anyway, I think probably we should wrap up this fine edition of the podcast where we covered Captain America like 403. It was a fantastic issue. We highly recommend you read along with us on this. And as I wrap it up too, we've complained about Mark Grunwald plots going on. I think the dialogue is lessened than streets of poison. But still these books move at a glacial pace. We've gone from the start of the story where we had Captain America maybe show up in the woods to. Captain America is still just hanging out in the woods with Doctor Druid. We've met two characters who haven't really done anything. Wolverine has been skulking around in the background. And now maybe next issue we'll get to fight some werewolves. [01:08:38] Speaker A: I love that it's so slow. It's, you know, the. The best part about it is that it just. It just gets there slowly and safely and delivers you like a letter from the USP's. It's. I. You know, you know that it's coming and it'll get there when it gets there, delightfully when it gets there. And I can't ask for anything more. It makes me happy. It pleases my heart, tickles my toes, and it's brutal. I. You know what you don't like? I do, Dan. And I hope the listeners can enjoy it and read along with us. [01:09:30] Speaker B: Nobody believes you right now. I mean, you are wearing a mariner shirt, I believe. I can't really tell because your Internet's so terrible. I can't see the video, but it's. Yeah. And you're wearing, like. I feel like you could have said that about the ear of the mariners that you're wearing to move at a glacial pace. Never seem to go anywhere. You loved it because of their slow and safe, and they never win. [01:09:58] Speaker A: Oh, wow. [01:09:59] Speaker B: They weren't safe very often, though. But, yeah. Well, you know, Greg, I guess everybody has to like their own thing. [01:10:07] Speaker A: I mean, you know, I like aspects of the story, not the whole thing. It was exciting. It had Wolverine in it for a hot minute. [01:10:15] Speaker B: Like, what aspects of the story do you like? The fine writing, the intense plot, the great action sequences have Wolverine in it for a minute. So you were one of those that just wanted wolverine to show up and everything? [01:10:31] Speaker A: No. Yeah, it had. It had a sky cycle chase scene and. And there was a werewolves. [01:10:46] Speaker B: Well, we still know what's happening with the werewolf town. We don't know who the villain is. [01:10:51] Speaker A: Take me to werewolf City, where the grass is green and the werewolves are pretty. [01:10:58] Speaker B: I mean, you went there. I was going to David Bowie. Like, suffragette City. Like, I was thinking we could have werewolf City, but that's fine. Whatever. It's all good. Well, it's. It's not good, but it's all good because we're right here. Yeah, we're right here. Of course. Greg is the author of Starlight. Co author. Yeah, Starlight, which it may not be able to get on Kickstarter anymore. What do you mean, but if you still can. Yeah, then you should back up, because. [01:11:30] Speaker A: Yeah, we might be. It might. [01:11:31] Speaker B: Wibbly wobbly. Wibbly wobbly timey. Why? [01:11:34] Speaker A: I mean, yeah, you could get it. [01:11:37] Speaker B: But if you can't get any more, if you can't get any more on Kickstarter, then after issue seven releases, you can always just go to Amazon.com and buy it. Go there, so. [01:11:48] Speaker A: Because that's where you can get it. [01:11:50] Speaker B: Yeah. And then we. We're gonna be at Summer Con. Yeah. At the. At the state fair. Washington state Fairgrounds. It used to be the western Washington state Fairgrounds, but then they. They evolved in P. Washington on Saturday. Yes. June. [01:12:14] Speaker A: Friday. [01:12:14] Speaker B: 21St. [01:12:15] Speaker A: Friday or. [01:12:15] Speaker B: No, Friday. Friday. Sorry. Friday. I'm sorry. Somebody was trying to talk us into coming on Saturday. [01:12:21] Speaker A: Yeah, well, we're going on. We're going on Friday. [01:12:24] Speaker B: That's the tickets. We're going on Friday time 21st. Tickets bought and t shirts have been ordered. [01:12:33] Speaker A: Hats are being worn. [01:12:35] Speaker B: Yeah, Greg will be wearing a t shirt that says, I clicked the button. [01:12:40] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah, I clicked up. [01:12:42] Speaker B: But you'll be able to find Greg. If you can find me, I might talk to you. If you find us, greg will definitely talk to you. [01:12:49] Speaker A: So maybe, I don't know, I might leave it over to Dan, but that's a terrible idea. I will talk. I will talk, and I will give you a sticker, and for a small nominal fee, take a photo together. I'm just joking. [01:13:10] Speaker B: I mean, if you want to pay for the photo, we will. If you want to pay for the photo, we welcome that. I mean, we accept all donations. [01:13:20] Speaker A: I did go somewhere and had a. I took a photo with someone, and then there was another guy that was taking the photo, and then he offered to take a photo with me, and then I was like, well, that'd be cool. And he's like, but there would be a nominal fee. And I was like, oh, and he wasn't joking. And I realized he wasn't joking because it would cost money to have a photo with him, but it was cool that he took a photo with me and my friend. [01:13:46] Speaker B: Wow. [01:13:47] Speaker A: But, yeah, I mean, have you ever. [01:13:49] Speaker B: Charged for your photo? [01:13:50] Speaker A: But he. He definitely does charge for his photos, and it was just funny that he actually took a picture for us, so I just thought it was funny. [01:14:01] Speaker B: Well, come find us. We're gonna go try to find Jim Shooter. [01:14:05] Speaker A: Yeah, we're gonna get him. [01:14:07] Speaker B: Dan Jergens. Yeah. [01:14:08] Speaker A: Dan Jerkins. Jim Shooter. [01:14:13] Speaker B: We'll probably spend more time with Dan Juergens if we can. I think Jim Shooter. [01:14:17] Speaker A: I mean, I still gotta see if I can find that book. It's time is short. [01:14:21] Speaker B: Which one? [01:14:22] Speaker A: The one. The one which I want. The one that he wrote. That's not grim boar, but Grimbor. [01:14:27] Speaker B: Oh, that. Yes. You need his novel. Well, I was gonna say I'm gonna be pulling out my Grimbor books to have him signed. Of course. Yeah. I mean, I just find it humorous. [01:14:40] Speaker A: Please sign this nomination. [01:14:41] Speaker B: Well, I mean, who doesn't want to look at a cover with Grimbor's attractive, bearish body? And please sign this beautiful chain, this. [01:14:50] Speaker A: Sign this thing for me that. It's, like, not a comic book. It's a. It's a thing at this comic book convention. [01:14:58] Speaker B: But, yeah, I mean, why not? You know, like, we're there, so. Yeah. And. And then you can find us there. We'll. We'll have. We'll have a good time. Good times. We might even hang out somewhere after. Well, we will. We just haven't disclosed that or decided so. But we will hang out somewhere afterwards too. And you're always welcome to tag along and disrupt my dinner or enjoy Greg's company. It's your choice. [01:15:23] Speaker A: Yes, disrupt and enjoy. Enjoy while you disrupt. That's. Yeah, I like that. [01:15:32] Speaker B: Okay, so there's that. And then. Yeah. Do you have. I guess, should you talk about the Meeker street place? [01:15:39] Speaker A: So I don't know enough details offhand to explain what's going on, because I'm bad at that. But I'm sure if you go to the Facebook page for the Meeker street, it's not. It's not even called that anymore. It is. [01:15:52] Speaker B: I was just gonna have you advertise your own stuff. I don't really care about the Beaker street fair or anything else that's happening. [01:15:58] Speaker A: I know. I don't even know what we're. What we're. We're. We're not, I don't think, doing anything that day. So, like, I don't know what we're involvement. What our involvement is. I know that. That the sea lug Lego folks on, and I don't even know the date, so I can't even tell you anything. I'm the worst. Yeah, go to. What you can do is you can go, usually, to the retro Emporium Facebook page and just take a look and see what's posted there about all the upcoming activities and events there. You will find all the information. Because I don't have it off offhand, but you will find all the information there. [01:16:43] Speaker B: And, of course, if you want to be trained better than the Taskmaster can train you. You always could go to certified martial arts in Tacoma, Washington, on 27th and Bridgeport Way and train with jiu jitsu lawyer Paul Boudreau. Yeah. [01:17:00] Speaker A: Get trained by the best. He'll put you to the test, and then. [01:17:05] Speaker B: Yeah. In fact, Greg should come down and do some training. [01:17:07] Speaker A: Oh, lord, no. I'll get hurt. [01:17:11] Speaker B: You don't want to. You don't want to be trained by the best. [01:17:13] Speaker A: My grandma will be so sad. I'll come home and I won't be able to do anything. Thanks. [01:17:17] Speaker B: So what you're saying is you. It's good enough for everyone else, but you personally, you know, you don't want to be trained. I feel like it would keep you from getting hurt. I think that's the whole point. [01:17:30] Speaker A: I'm a grandma's boy, and grandma says, no rough housing. [01:17:35] Speaker B: Really? I don't think grandma would say that at all. I think if grandma saw you, like, choking out people at tournaments and stuff, she would be very proud of you. In fact, she might even say. She'd probably say something like, oh, I see that you're a real athlete. Just like when she told you you had a real job. Oh, my God. [01:17:52] Speaker A: Oh, wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. [01:17:59] Speaker B: That's painful. Are we hitting it too hard? Wow. [01:18:05] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:18:08] Speaker B: Geez. Wow. Okay, so when I become japanese, grandma, it's not as fun. I say. That's what you're saying? [01:18:16] Speaker A: Yes, yes, that's. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. [01:18:20] Speaker B: Okay, well, I'll stop being japanese grandma, then. [01:18:23] Speaker A: I mean, for those listening, like, my. When my first book came out, it was. Oh, that's nice that it came out. And then when it. When it was. When it was carried by Kinikunya, a japanese bookstore had it as a selected book, and their collection that. That actually, when junior braves was at Barnes and Noble. That's okay. That. Oh, that's nice. But when. When it came out in Kunikunya, that was amazing. That was an accomplishment. That was a feat among feats, because it was in a japanese bookstore, so that meant I actually had made it. [01:19:02] Speaker B: I see. Yeah, I see. So, well, you have to know what Baba wants, right? Like, and I bet she made you a wonderful dinner, too, after that. [01:19:10] Speaker A: Yes, she did. Yes, she did. As always. [01:19:13] Speaker B: See? I mean, I was a real. And honestly, if you can. If you can just get the sample Baba's cooking, then, you know, that's. [01:19:20] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, no, it. Like, anytime that she. She makes something to eat, I eat it, even if I can't. Even if I shouldn't eat it anymore, I eat it because I know that she makes it with love. And, yeah, she's trying to kill me, so sometimes. But trying to kill me with lip, who knows? I don't know. It's always good. It's always good. [01:19:43] Speaker B: Well, I think the important thing to remember is that we're here every week for your listening pleasure, and you should come back and you should read some of these cap wolf books. You, of course, should go to project nerd and check them out, or at least follow them on some of the socials. And you can course follow us on socials, too. We're there. You can even listen to us on YouTube. Like, it's fantastic. You get a really cool YouTube thing. That's just the audio, so it's because it's a podcast. So there you go. And do you have any final things to say to anyone? [01:20:15] Speaker A: Final things to say to people? You know, all I can say is, remember, the books that we cover we could only do with your choices and selections. So please select and choose more fun stuff that doesn't drive dancing. [01:20:34] Speaker B: We can only do this. We can only do this because of listeners like you. [01:20:38] Speaker A: Like you. [01:20:40] Speaker B: Like you. Like you and you and you and. [01:20:44] Speaker A: You and you over there. [01:20:45] Speaker B: All right, I'm leaving. Goodbye. What? [01:20:47] Speaker A: No. Oh, gosh. Oh, no. He's leaving me, folks. Oh, no. I think my mouse. The battery is, like, I got to take the batteries out and do the battery trick where you. And then I can hit the button. That's not the right button.

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